Damnit, I need lady help

"Big Bubba Ray" (eganward01) 06/19/2014 at 02:44 • Filed to: None

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Have a C10 for your time, folks.

So I've known this girl for about two years. She's 19 and I'm 22. For some reason, she and all my friends think it would be weird if we dated or something cause of the age gap. I was actually her boss (and hired her) at our previous job. That's where I initially met her. Ever since then, we've hit it off and we've both told each other that we like one another very much.

The problem is that she is extremely hesitant to go out with me or anything cause she's scare of what her friends or family might think if she's dating someone older.

It's pissing me off cause I really like this girl. Sorry for the rant, Oppo.

E30Joe drives a Subaru > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:46

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You're both adults.

3 or so years isn't that big a gap when you look at it down the road.

Big Bubba Ray > E30Joe drives a Subaru 06/19/2014 at 02:50

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That's what I'm saying. My friends think it's weird and so do her friends. It's frustrating as hell.

Denver Is Stuck In The 90s > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:51

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Dude, My mom is 4 and a half years older than my dad and they've been together for 22 years. They just had an anniversary the weekend before fathers day. Your fine dating her

E30Joe drives a Subaru > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:52

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I honestly think it's pretty normal. Once you're out of high school "The age gap" is stupid and shouldn't hold you back from being happy.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:53

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that is not a significant age gap. if she and her friends aren't mature enough to see that it might be time to move on.

beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:54

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Half your age plus 7 is the social rule for how young you can go. So she's legal and above the social stigma age. Your friends are stupid.

It's only weird if you're still her boss.

Big Bubba Ray > E30Joe drives a Subaru 06/19/2014 at 02:54

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Ya I know. It sounds weird, but she just graduated and I'm a junior in college. I guess people my age are just used to dating others who are exactly their age.

E30Joe drives a Subaru > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:55

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Whatever man, I, as a 19 year old man child, would have no gripes about hitting on a 22 year old chick. Your friends are strange people.

Big Bubba Ray > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 06/19/2014 at 02:56

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Its tough. I haven't wanted to have a girlfriend in years but this girl is something else. She's awesome. Might be time to suck it up and move on.

-Amateur > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 02:59

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If you look at it, she's technically a freshman in college at that point. That age gap is not a big deal by any stretch of the imagination. My dad had 7 years on my mom when they dated in their 20s. As long as she's over 18, it's alllll gravy my friend.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 03:00

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but can she drive stick

Big Bubba Ray > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 06/19/2014 at 03:02

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SHE CAN. I taught her haha

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 03:03

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wife her

StoneCold > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 03:04

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Totally A-Okay. Just be aware if you do 21+ things, you'll have to make arrangements.

Big Bubba Ray > beardsbynelly - Rikerbeard 06/19/2014 at 03:06

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Not her boss anymore haha I left my previous job and she quit about 2 months ago.

Big Bubba Ray > StoneCold 06/19/2014 at 03:08

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I'm dunk so maybe I'm missing the point, but what do you mean?

StoneCold > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 03:13

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You are over 21. She is under 21. If there are places that don't allow people under 21 at certain times (bars, concerts, etc), you have to make accommodations for that. One of my friends had this situation, so we never got to meet the gal.

Big Bubba Ray > StoneCold 06/19/2014 at 03:20

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Ahhhh, ya I got ya. Honestly, I have a diverse group of friends and most of them are under 21 so it wouldn't be a problem.

OkCars- 22k Crossroads > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 03:35

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Fuck hers/yours friends opinions, If you like her, and she likes you go for it, Nothing wrong it 3 years of difference. Tell all of them to ask their parents ages and some will be surprised

Squid > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 05:50

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3 years is nothing. It seems more important when you are young but as you grow older you realize it is less important. What is important though is that you enjoy each others company and get along great. There is a slight maturity gap at that age but it really is negligible. I'm 29 and some of my closest friends right now are 22 and 23. Really it isn't like you are robbing the cradle with her being 19.

samssun > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 06:59

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Think of it this way. She's at her prime, you're a decade from yours (maybe more), ergo if anything you're too young for her.

JGrabowMSt > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 07:53

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My beautiful other half is three years older than me. When you let age get in the way, you miss out. Unfortunately, thats a life lesson you only learn after the fact.

Think about it like this: she's in a different mindset. She's young, and not sure what she wants in life. She's just beginning to figure it all out. You can do one of two things. You can wait until she's ready, and just be there for her to prove that you care and you're up for the task, or you can force things to go "how you want it," in which case she might be miserable.

Youre thinking too much into it. Before I started dating my girlfriend, I dated a girl younger than me, and I always felt it was a struggle because I was emotionally ahead of her. It wasnt wrong, and the relationship was great for almost two years, but ultimately, her immaturity got the best of the relationship. While thats not an accurate representation of everyone, its important to keep in mind that theres nothing you can do about it.

Just be there for her. If you care about her, its the best thing you can do. The most important thing you can do starts right this second. Stop liking her. I dont mean start liking someone else, but prove your maturity to her, and prove that theres more to you and her than a pants-off-dance. You care about her, and you want to be a part of her life.

Team6.1 > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 08:04

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The 3 year gap down the road is pretty negligable, but not being 21 and not being able to go to bars makes for a pain in the ass

Meatcoma > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 08:18

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Just tell your friends that you like em young.

If that does not work, you can always tell them that it was a choice between this girl or your friend's mom and let them decide. Unless their mom is uggo or a bitch.

Roundbadge > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 08:55

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22-19 is not an age difference. I'm 39, and my gf (of almost 11 years) and I have the same age gap.

If you were, say 27-30 and she was still 19, that would be a real age difference. You two were (or would have been) in high school together (don't know what schools you went to). At that age, her being 14-15 and you being 17-18 would've been more to be concerned about. Now, you're both out of school, and for all intents and purposes you are adults. The law can't even frown on this now. The concerns are silly.

Eff the haters, get the girl.

Nibbles > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 09:06

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The average age difference between couples in the developed world is between two to three years, with the female partner being younger.

$kaycog > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 09:09

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I don't think that's a big age difference at all. Go for it!

E92M3 > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 09:27

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I dated a girl that was a senior when I was 20 (she was 17 at first, turned 18 before she graduated). It was only weird when she asked me to go to her prom, or she brought some junior friends around (I remember thinking how immature they were).

JEM > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 10:12

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Your friends are being petty, shallow, and stupid. That is not an age gap.

When I was 25, I dated someone who was 17. That was an age gap.

Mattbob > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 10:20

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Dat gap.... Nothing but good things can come of it.

https://www.google.com/search?q=dat+g…

bob and john > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 15:55

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1/2 ur age plus 7 is the lower limit when it starts to get creepy.

also, 3 years? not really. I dating a girl who is 2 year young then me. I'm 19, shes 17. her fam approves (granted, i'm also romainain like her, we meet in a high school full of asians) its not that bad.

Chteelers > Big Bubba Ray 06/19/2014 at 16:11

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Started dating my current wife when she was 19 and I was 25. You're fine.

BJohnson11 > Big Bubba Ray 06/20/2014 at 22:42

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Half plus 7 rule dictates you're good.